The CarusometerA Carusometer rating of 4

Third-episode verdict: Alcatraz (Fox)

In the US: Mondays, 9pm ET/PT, Fox
In the UK: Acquired by Watch

Well, normally I hold out until episode three of a show in case it gets better, since usually you can expect some quality change in a show by that point.

Alcatraz, though, has enviable consistency. After a surprisingly dull first two set of episodes, episode three – its explicit ‘origins’ – proved to be amazingly identical to them in almost every way. The procedural element of the show was just a massive plod through gross serendipity crossed with colossal stupidity. We got absolutely no revelations about the central mystery, only more mystery that wasn’t actually that interesting. Parminder Nagra was still stuck in a hospital bed, not saying anything. And the female lead still looked about 16. In fact, she seems to be getting younger.

Beyond Sam Neill and the vague possibility that there’s something good hidden deep inside this mystery, there are no reasons to watch this show. So I shalln’t.

Carusometer rating: 4
Rob’s prediction: Should stagger on until the end of the season at least. Could possibly even get a second season. But it doesn’t deserve to.

 

Friday’s “Sky Atlantic’s Julia Davis comedy, Spiral remake and Army Wives (UK)” news

Film

Theatre

British TV

  • Channel 5 acquires Once Upon A Time
  • Julia Davis to write and star in Hunderby for Sky Atlantic
  • ITV commissions dramas about soldiers’ wives and girlfriends

US TV

  • Fox orders John Wells comedy Prodigy Bully
  • Wednesday ratings: Touch starts well
  • CBS orders comedy pilot from Rebel Wilson…
  • …and three drama pilots, including Mommy Track Mysteries, Quean and a 60s Las Vegas sheriff show from Nicholas Pileggi
  • Bebe Neuwirth to recur on The Good Wife
  • Alias‘s Kevin Weisman to recur on Awake
  • (Nearly year-old news) BBC America remaking Engrenages/Spiral

Thursday’s “The Office spin-off, White Van Man’s green light, CBS’s Widow Detective and Alan Ball’s Banshee” news

Film

Radio

British TV

  • Netflix acquires Freemantle UK content
  • Channel 4 to invest £450m in local production, reduce US acquisitions again…
  • …reports first annual loss in over a decade

US TV

Wednesday’s “Beauty and the Beast pilot, A Very British Coup remake and a Homeland walkthrough” news

Film

British TV

  • Gabriel Byrne to star in Channel 4 remake of A Very British Coup

US TV

  • Season 7 of 30 Rock could be a mini-season
  • Tia Carrere to guest on In Plain Sight
  • Fox picks up Bill Lawrence’s Like Father
  • The CW picks up medical drama pilot First Cut
  • ABC orders pilot of Beauty and the Beast remake
  • Monday ratings: House stays on top, Alcatraz down just 9%
  • Alex Gansa walks us through the development of and first season of Homeland