The Medium is Not Enough

CBS ain’t what it used to be. The home of procedurals and television aimed at old, white, conservative guys, it used to only need to come up with four new shows a year to replace its duds, its reliable stable of franchises otherwise ticking over nicely.

But now it’s number two, its franchises are dying, and there are fewer and fewer old, white, conservative guys still alive to watch its shows. So following on from USA, NBC, Fox and ABC, here’s this year’s surprisingly large crop of new shows unveiled by CBS at its Upfronts, all designed to bring in a new viewership:

• Bull: white guy helps fix trials while his white team looks on adoringly
• Doubt: sexy lawyer Katherine Heigl is falling for her sexy white guy client
• The Great Indoors: old-school white guys mock diverse millennials they don’t understand
• Kevin Can Wait: old white guy Kevin James retires
• MacGyver: young white guy tech genius follows in his old white guy father’s footsteps to defeat not-white guy criminals
• Man With A Plan: old white guy Matt LeBlanc tries to become a house husband but isn’t as good as his wife was
• Pure Genius: young white guy tech genius cures all known diseases
• Training Day: old white guy cop mentors naive young black guy cop

Spotting a problem yet? Oh yes. And there’s Star Trek. But that’s online.

Health warning: all the following trailers are virtually unwatchable and could lower your IQ

Continue reading “CBS’s upfronts 2016-7 – a rundown and clips from the new shows”

We’ve seen the worst – and best – that USA, Fox and NBC are planning to offer us in the Fall 2016-2017 season. Now it’s the turn of ABC.

Currently placed fourth in the ratings, it’s no surprise there’s been a change of management in the company and with new blood comes new ideas… and plenty of cancellations. That means there’s a big roster of new shows for ABC this Fall:

• American Housewife: A woman is fat.
• Conviction: A woman is badly behaved.
• Designated Survivor: Kiefer Sutherland is president.
• Downward Dog: A dog comments on a woman’s life.
• Imaginary Mary: An imaginary friend comments on a woman’s life.
• Notorious: A news producer and a lawyer are friends.
• Speechless: A woman has a disabled son.
• Still Star-Crossed: A sequel to Romeo and Juliet
• Time After Time: HG Wells and Jack The Ripper in modern day New York.

One caveat: I said new blood and new ideas, but obviously I meant “More of the same.” Sorry about that.

Continue reading “ABC’s upfronts 2016-7 – a rundown and clips from the new shows”