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Some of the best articles on the blog. Typically, these have a picture. It's a low entrance requirement, I know.

October 6, 2016

Review: Conviction 1x1 (US: ABC; UK: Sky Living)

Posted on October 6, 2016 | Post a comment | Bookmark and Share


In the US: Mondays, 10/9c, ABC
In the UK: Acquired by Sky Living. Will air in November

This is not a paying job. I try to keep the ads to a minimum. I ignore the now daily requests for 'native advertising' ("I am interested in publishing an article on your website which will be relevant to the theme of your website and am happy to suggest some topics to you") - they are not for me. I want this place to stay classy.

That does mean everything on TMINE has to fit round the stuff I actually do get paid for, though, so I don't always have the time to do everything I'd like to do. Like proof-read. You probably noticed that.

Anyway, right now, all things being equal, I'd be getting out my copy of Adobe Illustrator CC to design a cracking mock up of an Ikea illustration in which a rather large number of bog standard parts are put together to assemble a television that looks exactly the same as any other television. Maybe I'd even make a video of it being assembled in Premiere.

But I don't have the time to do that. Instead, I'll have to paint a picture of Conviction with mere words. 

Imagine basically any ensemble procedural show in which you have a crack team of lawyers/doctors/antelope wranglers, all the top of their respective fields, all representing at least one aspect of diversity, but each with one specific issue that none of the others has. They'll work very hard each week to solve whatever the problem is, because they care so very, very hard and are just so, so brilliant. But they'll work extra hard if in some way the problem of the week touches on their issue.

However, said show can't be something like Chicago Fire, Chicago Med, Chicago PD or Chicago Justice. No, it has to be the specific sub-variety of "brilliant but damaged leaders who speak their minds" shows, where the show is really about the leader and everyone else is subversient to him or her, no matter how racist they are. Think Shark. Think House.

In fact, specifically think House because Conviction's co-creator is Liz Friedman, last seen being played by the ridiculously marvellous Hudson Leick on the equally ridiculously marvellous Hercules: The Legendary Journeys episode Yes, Virginia, There Is A Hercules. No, really - watch for a couple of minutes and you'll see what I mean.

Anyone, she was a producer on House so knows how to do these things backwards. 

And now, you've got Conviction in which Hayley Atwell (Marvel's Agent Carter) plays the messed up genius who heads the team of underlings who work hard every episode to prove her right. She's the daughter of a former president, she used to be a DA with a 95% prosecution rate, then she became a law professor. Then she started taking cocaine and shagging all her students. Oops.

Anyway, DA Eddie Cahill - whose greying temples make me feel so old because I remember him when he was Rachel's 'toy boy' boyfriend on Friends - lets her off, provided she head up his new unsafe convictions unit. Her job is to make sure everyone in prison should be in prison, the theory being that it takes a coke-addict bad girl to spot a coke-addict bad girl. At first, she takes it as sinecure. But soon, she begins to enjoy the job.

And that's all you really need to know. It is absolutely generic procedural TV. Atwell, who's forced to deploy an exceedingly wobbly American accent, clearly accepted Conviction as a lifeboat role when Agent Carter was being cancelled. There's certainly no artistic merit to it, nothing remarkable about it, other than the idea that the only unique thing a female leader could offer is cleavage and an ability to party. I'm not sure that's a selling point.

Of course, Atwell can't actually be truly heartless in the same way as Gregory House is, because she's a woman so wouldn't be likable. So there have to be signs she cares and she's touched when mothers demand she care about their innocent/dead sons and daughters. Little tears and everything. 

Legal insights are also minimal and there are attempts to steal from any other crime show that's passing in the hope that something might be popular - we even have some CSI-ing by lawyers, in which they take a pig carcass out into the woods at night to see if there are any flies on it in the morning. Guess what, idiots: either you scared the flies away or you didn't wait the several days necessary for the eggs to hatch, none of it's admissable and you could have just asked a forensic scientist. So why did you spend an entire night in the woods with a pig carcass, you great steaming twats?

Anyway, insert tab A into slot A, take flange B and attach it to nozzle C. Now you've built your own Conviction, you don't need to take this one home.

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October 5, 2016

Preview: Falling Water 1x1 (US: USA)

Posted on October 5, 2016 | Post a comment | Bookmark and Share

Falling Water

In the US: Thursdays, 10/9c, USA. Starts October 13

You'd be hard-pushed to think of anyone who watched more than an episode or two of Netflix's Sense8 and thought to themselves, "Let's have more of that, please." Well, maybe a few masochists and sex-starved teenagers, but that's about it.

And to be fair, Falling Water, USA's new show about three strangers who (literally) share a dream has been in the works since 2013. But you'd still have thought USA would have put an end to it as soon as Sense8 came out, not just because of the similarities but because Sense8 really is that bad.

Maybe they thought to themselves, "Well, it's a bit different. Maybe a bit more like Inception or Dreamscape. We can get away with it, surely."

No. You can't, USA. Because Falling Water is almost as bad as Sense8. Almost.

Here's a trailer that's about five times more exciting than the first episode.

Continue reading "Preview: Falling Water 1x1 (US: USA)"

October 4, 2016

Review: Westworld 1x1 (US: HBO; UK: Sky Atlantic)

Posted on October 4, 2016 | Post a comment | Bookmark and Share


In the US: Sundays, 9pm, HBO
In the UK: Tuesdays, 9pm, Sky Atlantic

The first of anything is usually pretty ropey. Whether it's a book, a computer program, a movie genre or a species of animal, you can usually bet it'll be a while before all the bugs are ironed out of it.

Arguably, Michael Crichton's 1973 directorial debut Westworld wasn't even his first 'theme park goes wrong' story. After all, although The Andromeda Strain isn't about a theme park, it still embodies the fundamental Crichton idea of a great technological construction going wrong because of imperfect human knowledge and hubris, with the whole thing subsequently doing its best to kill all the human beings in its environs. 

But Westworld is still his first proper theme park and as a movie, it's not that great. It sees a whole bunch of tourists coming to a fantasy world populated by androids and gynoids who are there to enact scenarios and interact with the guests for their entertainment. But as said robots aren't alive and don't have animus, the guests are able to kill them, shag them and do all manner of unconscionable acts to them conscionably and without fear of reprisal or harm to themselves.

Then one day the slaves revolt and turn on their masters, with one gunslinger in the cowboy-themed 'Westworld' deciding he's going to hunt down two guests in particular.

Part of the general dystopian sci-fi of the 70s, there's not much to Westworld. You get a general tour of the various 'worlds'. You get to watch as our heroes have a bit of fun playing dress up as cowboys. Then everything goes pear-shaped and it's a mad race for survival.

But that's about it. There's no real examination of the morals and ethics of the theme park and no proper explanation for why everything goes wrong - for that, you have to wait for the un-Crichtonesque sequel Futureworld, and you'll have seen better explanations for unexplained computer behaviour on the average App Store update list. 

Westworld's biggest contribution to culture was certainly not the brief spin-off TV series, Beyond Westworld, which you might have caught of a morning in the 80s on ITV if you're an oldie like me. That was actually worse than the movie, following on from Futureworld by giving us a mad scientist using the Delos robots to try to take over the world.

No, Westworld's sole proper contribution to global culture was its iconic gunslinger played by Yul Brynner - a relentless implacable, near-indestructible robot, whose first person robotic POV we get to experience on occasion, he's the clear progenitor of Arnold Schwarzenegger's Terminator.

In fact, it took a new book by Crichton, Steven Spielberg and another 10 years before Crichton's theme park motif could be perfected in the form of Jurassic Park.

But as Anthony Hopkins points out in HBO's new version of both Westworld and the Crichton motif, evolution only works by making mistakes. Those mistakes enable even better versions of things to be created. And HBO's Westworld is both beautifully made and close to genius, even though it's quite hard to watch.

The show's written by Burn Notice's Lisa Joy and her husband Jonathan Nolan, who's not only helped to write some of big brother Christopher's finest (Memento, The Prestige, Interstellar, The Dark Knight, he's also no stranger to the world of artificial intelligence, having created and exec produced Person of Interest. Rather than take the Westworld plot and string it out over an entire season, Joy and Nolan instead decide to use it to examine - in much the same, but far less glossy a way as Channel 4's recent Humans did - not only what it is to be human but what it must be like to be artificially intelligent, and how the way we treat what we regard as sub-human shows us what we're like.

The first episode gives us both twists on the original's gunslinger as well as a whole new set of characters, including brothel owner Thandie Newton, but principally Evan Rachel Wood - a seemingly ordinary, happy gynoid but one who has a secret revealed at the end. Through her, we're shown what it must be like to have one's consciousness subject to reprogramming and memories subject to constant erasure. We also learn of man's potential for inhumanity to both man and woman when he believes there are no consequences and that's frequently disturbing and unpleasant to watch.

Behind the scenes, we have a slightly Hunger Games vibe, with Borgen's Sidse Babett Knudsen trying to run the park smoothly, Luke Hemsworth trying to keep the robots in line and Simon Quarterman trying to come up with fun scenarios for the guests. Meanwhile, programmer Jeffrey Wright (The Hunger Games 2) is trying to find out why the latest update from creative director Anthony Hopkins to the robots is causing problems. Could it be his decision to allow memories to pervade as a subconsciousness in the robots is enabling them to become something more than intended? 

Westworld's most interesting when it's at its subtlest, musing on some aspect of human behaviour, such as how memories can inspire mannerisms, or how closed systems invariably will come into conflict with other systems and have to adjust - such as when a photograph from the outside world turns up in Westworld, prompting one android to have a Community finale moment:

But it also benefits from decades of advances in computing and familiarity with computing. It's not mystical and abstruse as it was when the original movie came out. Upgrades, downgrades, bug fixes et al are the stuff of the everyday now, and the show is able to use that and turns them into something far more interesting. If intelligence can be artificial, what would it mean if you could be made smarter or more conscious through a simple .1 upgrade patch? Or if your free will could be turned off with a slider in your preferences settings? Westworld goes there, but questions mechanicity and asks if such a thing is even possible, or is there something more to being human - albeit something that could be reproducible?

All of which makes it sound less fun than it actually is. But there's also comedy, pathos and more, as well as twists to keep you intrigued. You're going to need a strong stomach, too, because even though you know firstly that it's a TV show and secondly the characters are robots, it's as hard to avoid empathising with them as it is to avoid feelings during the title sequence of Android. Is that what separates us from robots as Phil Dick postulated in Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep? Or is even that difference an illusion?

All in all, an extremely promising start and I expect that Joy and Nolan are only just beginning to limber up for the real meat of the story. Fingers crossed, this will be a classic.

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